Transforming Into a Different Person for Love

You changed for the person you love, or they made you change? What does it matter if you decided to change or the pressure from your partner made you discard your old self and create a new one especially for them (so that they wouldn't leave)? You're no longer the person you once were, and now, even your closest friends barely recognize your personality. 

Does this resonate? You're not alone. People often change their personality to please someone they love for a few reasons:

1.   Desire for Approval  : They want to be liked and accepted by their partner. Approval can feel rewarding and affirming.

2.   Fear of Rejection  : They fear losing the person they love. Changing their behavior or personality might seem like a way to avoid conflict or rejection.

3.   Perceived Expectations  : They believe their partner wants them to be different. This perception can drive them to change to meet these assumed expectations.

4.   Insecurity  : They might feel that their true self isn't good enough. Changing who they are might seem like a way to be more lovable or worthy.

5.   Idealization  : They put their partner on a pedestal and believe that aligning with their partner's preferences or personality is the best way to maintain the relationship.

While these reasons can drive someone to change, it's important to remember that lasting and healthy relationships are built on authenticity and mutual acceptance. Pretending to be someone else can lead to stress, resentment, and a loss of self-identity.


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