Surviving Valentines: Advice For People Who Hate It

Guess what? Valentine's Day is right around the corner!  So, I have a question for you... are you feeling a bit Valentine's-phobic? If you're single, do you ever cringe at the thought of walking into your favorite places only to find them decked out with heart-shaped decorations and couples indulging in PDA?  Are you maybe gritting your teeth at the idea of every hotel room being booked because it seems like everyone is planning a romantic getaway?   If you're in a relationship, are you dreading the guilt that sneaks in because you really don't feel like joining in on the Valentine's Day festivities like everyone else?  Perhaps you're worried that your gift won't hit the mark (if you've even prepared one in the first place)? If you answered yes to any of these questions, welcome to the Valentine's-phobic club!   Now, I didn't write this post to convince you that Valentine's is the ultimate test of romance or to change your feelings abou

Spoken Word: I Am Seen and Heard

We see the phrase "you are seen, you are heard, you matter" everywhere in social media now. But do we really know how it feels? I do.  For so long, I've been a ghost. A flicker in the background, a fleeting image in the periphery of people's lives.  Nobody really looked, did they?  They saw a facade, a veneer of who I wanted to be, who they wanted me to be.  Smile, nod, laugh at the right moments—play the part, and then vanish.  I perfected the art of being pleasantly forgettable.  But he... oh, he sees me.  When I'm with him,  I can't just blend into the wallpaper. My camouflage fails.  He strips me of my invisibility with a mere glance, a simple question:  "How are you really doing?"  He'll ask, and I'll falter. Because he's not asking to fill the silence. He's asking because he genuinely wants to know. It's unsettling but liberating.  When I think something, he notices; he reacts.  He catches that fleeting shadow across my face

A Situationship is Like an Oarless Boat

 So you're knee-deep in a situationship, huh? Don't worry, it's a confusing space that so many of us have found ourselves wading through. Imagine a boat on a lake, no oars, drifting wherever the wind decides to push it.  That's you, that's me, that's all of us caught in the web of a situationship.  What's confusing about it? We text all day, share memes, and even spend nights together, but label it? Nah, that's "too complicated."  Here's where the confusion sets in. Can you get mad when they don't text you back right away? Do you have a right to feel hurt when you see them posting pictures with someone else? The boat drifts, but the water isn't clear enough to see what's at the bottom. There's a murky cloud of questions like, "Do I have the right to ask where this is going?" You feel stuck, yet strangely comfortable, in a land that's not quite friendship, not quite a committed relationship. Boundaries and Groun

3 Signs You're a Bad Kisser

Kissing is an art, and like any art form, it requires practice and finesse. Sometimes, despite your best intentions, you might not be hitting the right notes when it comes to smooching. If you're worried that your kissing skills might need a little improvement, here are three signs that you might be a less-than-stellar kisser. 1. Your Partner's Lack of Enthusiasm: Read the Signals    One of the most telling signs that your kissing technique might need some work is your partner's enthusiasm, or lack thereof. Pay attention to their body language and verbal cues. If they seem distant, disengaged, or avoidant when it comes to kissing, it's a clear sign that something might be amiss.    Instead of brushing off their behavior, communicate openly and honestly. Ask your partner for feedback about what they enjoy and what they might want you to do differently. Remember that kissing is a two-way street, and it's essential to be attuned to your partner's desires and comfor

Secrets of a Gemini Guy

The Fascinating Paradox of the Gemini Guy  The Magician of Multitasking  I remember the first time I saw My Gemini Guy in action. He was juggling a phone call with a client, scrolling through a presentation on his laptop, and somehow also managing to make himself a sandwich—all without breaking a sweat. It was mesmerizing and a tad overwhelming.  To many, multitasking can be a chaotic affair, but not for My Gemini Guy. His mind worked like a well-oiled machine, capable of toggling between tasks with a sense of ease I could never quite understand.  Here's the kicker:  Despite his knack for handling multiple things at once, My Gemini Guy was never one to settle for mediocrity. The guy was a born dreamer. Always striving for a higher position or a loftier goal, contentment seemed to elude him.  His ambition didn't stop at climbing the corporate ladder, either. It spilled over into his personal relationships, always pushing those around him towards self-improvement. "If you

3 Signs Your Relationship is Over Before It Even Starts

Love is an elusive beast, hard to catch but even harder to keep. In a world where everything moves at the speed of a tweet, the notion of a lasting relationship may seem like a relic of a bygone era. Yet, some relationships seem doomed from the get-go, crumbling under the weight of inattention, indifference, and sometimes, an unfortunate surplus of pride. While it's tempting to blame fate or circumstance, there are often clear indicators that a relationship is on the rocks before it even takes its first breath. Let's examine three tell-tale signs your relationship was over before it really began. 1. Monologue Over Dialogue: The Solo Planner Ah, planning—the bedrock of any functional relationship. It's not just about choosing the right Netflix series or deciding who gets the last slice of pizza. It's about joint decisions that symbolize a shared journey. If you find yourself making plans for the weekend, picking out restaurants, or even planning trips without considering

Spoken Word: How I Know I Am Loved

When I saw him, I knew he's different.  He doesn't just look at me; he sees me. Really sees me.  There's this intensity in his gaze that's almost intimidating but comforting at the same time.  It's as if he's peeling back layers, sifting through the fa├žade I’ve so carefully built over the years, and finding the person underneath.  A person I didn't even know existed anymore.  When I talk to him...   His eyes don't glaze over.  He's not waiting for his turn to speak, but listening—every word, every pause, every breath.  He hears the things I don't say, the things I'm too afraid to voice.  He senses the hesitations, the fears, the unspoken dreams that I've buried deep.  And he reacts...  He asks questions, not out of mere curiosity but from a desire to understand—to know me better.  No one has ever made me feel this vulnerable, and yet so safe at the same time. I can’t be a liar around him; he'd call me out in an instant.  With him, I c

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