The Fade Out – Easiest Way to Let Go of an Almost-Relationship
Before we discuss what a fade out is and why this ‘tactic’ is more common than we realize, let’s discuss what an ‘almost-relationship’ is. We all know that a love relationship can only begin when both parties are on the same page. Both the guy and the girl understand that there’s something between them that’s worth pursuing.
If only one partner thinks the connection is real and could last longer, it’s an ‘almost-relationship’. If both parties are in it for the ride, while knowing that it would end soon enough, the couple is in an ‘almost-relationship’. In simple terms, it’s a fling.
Now, on to the fade out….
Here are some situations that can be called a fade out…
- He goes on vacation (to a place where there is no way to contact him or he’d be too busy to contact anyone), but says he will call as soon as he gets back. He never calls back even when his facebook wall is filled with chatter about his return to the city.
- She tells the guy she enjoyed the date, but after a week of no communication, she’s suddenly up to her neck in paperwork or school work, and is too busy to even return a text message.
A person would sooner fade into the background and hope the other person does not notice, than own up to his or her actions. People who take the coward’s way out of a relationship are normally iffy about hurting others, not that they care about the other person’s feelings. They just are not ready for all the emotional outburts and the feeling of guilt.
Why is a fade out the easiest way to break up a relationship that never really started?
Simply put, there’s less drama. She doesn’t need to tell the guy that she was bored with him, or that she isn’t interested. He does not need to explain why he cannot have a serious girlfriend at the moment, or why he is still flirting with other women even after they had a “connection”.
The worst thing about a fade out is…
A rejection, especially one that is not explained in any way, can mess with someone’s head. Why was he so warm that night but so cold afterward? Why did she say she likes me but never picks up the phone when I call? Was he lying when he said the sex was good for him too? The questions are endless.
If you have never attempted a fade out in the past, good for you. You’re obviously a straightforward person, regardless of the consequences.
29 Responses to “The Fade Out – Easiest Way to Let Go of an Almost-Relationship”
Comments
Read below or add a comment...
I think the fade out is a pretty good option if your significant other is the type of person who “gets it.” Like, they’re intuitive. I have a friend whose girlfriend totally did the fade out on him, and because he was more of the straightforward, analytical type, he didn’t quite get it and kept holding out hope. Even though the fade out seems kinder than a flat rejection, sometimes it’s not!
jenn @ t1 service´s last [type] ..More People Prefer FireFox over Internet Explorer
i would bet that these cowardly creatures are not just that in their relationships, they are cowards in most aspect of their lives. so not worth our time.
Chell´s last [type] ..Domain Name – How and where to buy your own
The classic fade out. I never really liked.
Adam – Ditto Effect´s last [type] ..What Do Guys Want For Valentine’s Day
happened to me recently……Yep its definately cowardice at its prime. Maybe its because im a very straight forward person but in my opinion its is much worse than the face to face rejection it leaves the person in limbo and makes wonder what went wrong. Definately not cool.
Yes and also your life goals are very different You are very taken with one another where there is chemistry, similar values and interests. However, you are very different places in your life. You desire to have a family and your boyfriend has his family already and does not want any more children.
Oh, how we are all so familiar with the fade-out. Either I’m getting it or I’m doing it. It’s a pretty lousy thing to endure…
A bad habit to practice. Even though it is harder, people should just be upfront with eachother.
i hate it. it’s hard when a person just fades away without letting you know what’s going on. i’m currently recovering from a very bad relationship. i had to drink every night so i can sleep without thinking.
Hmm, I wouldn’t let a relationship to fade away because I don’t know how I should react when I would face that person again.
I like to discuss with my partner and tell her that things aren’t working and we should first take a break or something similar.]
But, I would recommend not to get involve in such a relationship when you know that you are more involved then then the other person or the other way around.
Alex´s last [type] ..Jocuri barbie
If that’s fading out then, what do you call the kind that after a few months he’s starting to communicate with you again?
@Osenorita
I think that’s called ‘making the right decision’
While “fading out” is a quick and simple option to leave a relationship that’s not worth spending time and effort for, most of my friends (including me) would choose to opt for a clear disclosure on what is happening and where the relationship is going so there is no loose strings left hanging.
Honestly, I just had a relationship in which we split it quiet instead, had to remain enemies, thatss because some words were not his purpose may be to have an easy and does not I want to say first that we break. So he got out of yarn and started to offend.
George’s recently blog ..jocuri barbie
Hi,
I agree, the fade out method really is the easiest way of letting him/her go. I did it with a lot of my ex-girlfriends. The fade-out is the most harmless method of breaking up with someone in my opinion. Thanks for sharing!
Cadouri Victor
Cadouri´s last [type] ..Relax And Tone
I can relate to this post. Last year, I got really broken-hearted because of my girlfriend. She never gave me the chance to explain why I did not text her for one week. I got really a long time recovering from the pain of letting go. But now, I think the love I have for her is fading away and I got to move on.
Ron´s last [type] ..How to Detect Gynecomastia Symptoms
We always try to mingle with people in places where ever we go. We are on a package for a travel tour we make a small friendship relation. But we stay in contact only for a short period. To maintain a relation we have to stay in contact else it will fade out.
Lea G´s last [type] ..Period pain comics: it’s break time!
I dont agree, that we are not suppose to spoil the relationship for small things, I feel this is also not something to be hidden but they can have a clear picture and also clarity that will help to make better relationship with spouse by telling them the truth.
Lola T´s last [type] ..Agua de alpiste
Breaking up is not easy so I don’t like this ending the relationship or even the term of fading out. It is hard to communicate with a guy, who is not willing to communicate even when his facebook wall is filled with chatter about his return to the city. Maybe these kind of people are not worthy to pay attention and make emotional outbursts over them. I agree that rejection is the worst thing in fading out because being rejected will result on the guilt and insecurity. Thanks for the interesting article.
Stephan Hilson´s last [type] ..Comparatif de forfait mobile
It is very good to inform and fall out of a relationship than to just beat around the bush. Just be frank and tell what lies in your heart, instead of postponing the break up. If you are fading away from some person then it gives a sinking feeling to him or her and nothing is terrible than that.
Rodrigo Valenzuela´s last [type] ..Importantes consejos para conquistar a un hombre.
I think fading out is the worst way to break up. If the probable ex is mature enough, he or she will understand the situation and end the relationship with dignity. One thing that we all need to realize is that no relationship is perfect. It is just that in some relationships we will have to adjust a bit less and in other relationships a bit more
Leo´s last [type] ..El engaño del tabaco light
That fade out tactic was used by most men…I’m sure of it ^_^
Semidoppel´s last [type] ..Pinoy Big Brother…Not Again Please
when the relationship is not yet too involved, less drama is preferable (at least for me)
the magnitude of problems seems to diminish over time. what is big now may be small tomorrow. sometimes we just have to laugh over them. speaking of laughing, i’m sure you would enjoy this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPPTZS0TOJY
It is always better to be up front about what’s going on, but sometimes that can seem to backfire too. I went on a couple of dates with a girl and it just wasn’t clicking. She was super sweet and she was cute, but there just wasn’t a spark. I told her that it wasn’t going to work for me and that while I didn’t see myself being compatible in that regard, I thought she was an awesome girl. She told me that she “didn’t need any more friends” and that “I shouldn’t have lead her on”. We didn’t even share a kiss! So I agree that upfront is ALWAYS better, there are times when I can understand the urge to just fade away.
It was nice to read this after I had just done a fade-out with someone. I didn’t contact them as much as usual and they text me and asked if anything was wrong. Realizing that I am not into them as much as they had become I text them back that I am as interested as I once was. They thanked me for not stringing them along and would use this tactic in the future.
moving on is never easy as well as letting go. as im reading this, im thinking of one person and i still love that person..
I’m experiencing this and it’s really best to say things upfront…With this kind of situation you will keep on guessing on some things that are not well answered.
I think the fade out is normal if this person
and you are not established as a full fledge relationship.
Of course you give that person the thumbs up and should be
considerate, however most flames, kicking it, sex buddies
is what it is, and for that purpose eggs should not be put
in one basket on them. I faded out as well as an old flame
of mine, but we always stayed in contact from time to time
as friends. I knew the relationship was not of a boyfriend
and girlfriend, so there was no hard feelings. Either of us
were ready for a relationship. We are still friends til this day.
I think this guy is doing a fade out on me, or hoping I break up with him. Yesterday, I had a discussion about how his actions were making me feel, I made it clear that I if I was going to stick around then he has to make me feel good about myself and I’d be cool if he needed some space. He reassured me everything was alright, he said he’d call me but then he’s didn’t so I decided to go over in the morning anyway and surprise him..lol. He seemed happy to see me, I’m not sure if I’m being paranoid, but it seems I do most of the initiating and he really isn’t fussed, Yet, when I directly try to break up he tells me not to worry but I can’t help but think he’s messing with my head, so I’ve decided that I will play along anyway, if he wants out he’ll have to tell directly, because I’m not just going to fade out…lol