Romantic Conversation: the Secret of Words

Being an aspiring erotica writer (I bet you don’t know that yet, huh?), I always find it fun to play around with words and experiment with how they affect other people and myself. Some words provoke or bore us, and even make us just a bit weepy. A cursing match or what we call ‘b!tch session’ is only considered fair if both parties have similar cognition of most of the words exchanged. Similarly, a successful getting-to-know chat conversation will only work if both use descriptive language.

The secret of words is that an image automatically comes up in a person’s mind as soon as he utters the word or phrase. That image in turn stirs emotion, and incites a reaction. For example, voluptuous could mean several different things to different people; ’soda’ could make someone feel thirsty; and ‘wet’ could be a good thing or a bad thing.

In relationships, the way we convey our message reveals more about how we feel than we think. Hence the phrase ‘reading between the lines’. For example, a girl knows instinctively when her guy is still in love with his ex just by the way he says his ex’s name. In a normal conversation, he usually drops his guard long enough for you to really listen to what he isn’t saying.

Notice how often he mentions his ex? Now, replay the conversation in your mind and take note of how he said her name. Did he hesitate a bit? Did he say “you know my ex, Sheila (pause) … “?

You can say, “there’s a catch in his voice whenever he talks about her”. What happened is that his ex’s name invoked an image in his mind, and he reacted to it. His simple utterance of her name brought up a memory profound enough to affect him, and the listener (you) sensed it immediately.

And, remember, love is just a word unless you feel something when you say it.

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