My Cowboy Fetish and Taming the Bad Boy
By
You might have noticed that I jump at the chance to plug advertisements from AJ Western Wear Outfitters . This is all because of a secret fetish: Cowboys.
As far as fetishes are concerned, we know that these arise from something deeper, usually something we crave for but don’t know much about exactly. A secret pleasure or desire that we very rarely admit even to ourselves because it makes us uncomfortable.
The origin of my cowboy fetish is very clear to me.
It’s all about ‘taming’ the brooding bad boy, the rebel boyfriend, the wild guy that other women fell for but never really caught.
The proverbial cowboy is depicted as such: a loner who is aloof and malevolent to intruders in his personal space. At least that’s how I remember James Dean in his last movie, or the expression in this hottie’s eyes in this photo.
Come to think of it, this bad boy-attraction may even explain why I feel compelled to visit Dave Navarro’s site, 6767.com, despite that the whole world of Rock n Roll is alien to me.
How to Tame Your Rebel Boyfriend
1. Give him space. Loving an unruly guy means having the patience of thousands of crochet enthusiasts. Knowing full well that you’re falling for someone who has the reputation of a heart breaker should give you a hint that he won’t change overnight… not even for you.
2. Make Every Second Count. This type of guy demands a lot of alone time, and enough elbow room to do other things (those you might not approve of). Every date must be productive in that, you do not go out of your way to pick fights with him,
or become the needy girlfriend that you are. Make him remember your date as fun, lighthearted and whimsical. Give him a reason to smile when he thinks of you even when you’re not together.
3. Reassure Him That You Are Always There For Him. I don’t mean physically, but more of emotionally. Do not pretend to understand the inner struggle he is going through, or the reasons why he is the way he is. Just promise to be there when he is ready to open up.
4. Do not Use Love as a Hostage If you have ever started a sentence with “If you really love me….” then you probably know by now that it doesn’t work. He may indulge you for a second, but will revert back as soon as he feels that you are done trying to make him feel guilty.
A Story on Taming
from the Little Prince (Antoine de Saint Exupery)
“What does that mean?tame?” [asked the Prince]
“It’s an act too often neglected,” said the fox. “It means to establish ties.”
“To establish ties?”
“Just that,” said the fox. “to me, you’re still nothing more than a little boy who’s just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you.And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I’m nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes.
But if you tame me, then we shall need each other.
To me, you’ll be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world “
If you reached this post looking for answers on how to tame your partner, please be comforted with the fact that you are not alone.
Love is a never-ending cycle of taming and being tamed, and we all need to discover how one way or another.
:lv:

















10 Comments
May 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 pm
space is key to a relationship, without space you are destined for hell
http://www.queersunited.blogspot.com
queerunity’s last blog post..“Right to Serve” Preparing to Protest DADT
May 23rd, 2008 at 8:32 pm
I really liked that fox story
Those are good tips even if you don’t need to tame someone.
Chelle’s last blog post..I Have a Wild Amount of Entrecard Credits to Give Away?
May 23rd, 2008 at 8:44 pm
@chelle
Glad that you think so sister!
Sometimes we dont have to tame someone … but it is we who need taming.
May 25th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
So, the key is to tame a guy without having him feel he’s being tamed…
Take a look at Steve Pavlina’s post on How to Be a Man
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2008/05/how-to-be-a-man/
Notice, “2. Put your relationships second”. Food for thought…
Andre’s last blog post..Project DAD: Digital Guide for Fathers-to-be
May 26th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
taming is too hard. can’t things just be easy.
then again, where would be the challenge in that? hehehe
cigarette-girl’s last blog post..Being that girl on the side
May 26th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
@cig girl
i’ve always read that line in the Little Prince over and over when the guy just wont budge. It’s terribly difficult to keep the hope alive in the face of such imperious disregard
:sob:
May 27th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
Hey Woobie, good post. I have to add a point and disagree with your #3.
My added point is this: The chase is everything, so make him chase you, but also don’t forget to chase him back just a little bit. Badboys love the thrill of the hunt, and without it there’s nothing.
I also want to say DO NOT tame a badboy…once he loses his badboy nature, which is a core of your attraction, what have you got left? Just a regular nice guy. Boring!
Lance’s last blog post..Beware the Fatty of Doom
May 27th, 2008 at 6:56 pm
@lance
I hear you, lance. However, I really think that behind every bad boy is a girl who makes him feel safe. Like the dog house he returns to everyday no matter how hard he’s been chasing cats all day.
Im not sure the analogy fits.^^
May 29th, 2008 at 2:45 am
Little Prince, oks na babasahin. Nabigyan ako niyan ng GF ko noon sa highschool.
Mario’s last blog post..Bawal at Wrung
May 29th, 2008 at 3:06 am
@Mario
ok di ba? ang simple and ideal ng approach!