How Woobie Thinks of What to Post Next

I’ve listened to conversations like this since I started blogging, but this time I’ll let you eavesdrop…

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*prepares to post the entry of the day*

• A: She can’t post that, it’s too scandalous! The family-oriented people will unsubscribe! Are you crazy?
• D: The title is all the warning they need, dum-dum. Does it say ‘angelic woobie’? They know what to expect, and THAT’s why they subscribed!

*starts to type…*

• A: Ah-ah, it’s a little too naughty if you ask me. (brings forth all the Terms of Agreement Woobie agreed to)… it says here that she cannot post pronograffiti material while she’s running those ads…
• D: Just let her write the first sentence, for grudge’s sake! Then we’ll work from there…

*starts to type again*

• A: (coughs) what is she doing with that photo? Oh, I’m sure she knows how people can just right click and copy all the things that she places here… Be warned…. hmmmm?
• D: No, no, no! That’s perfect! People will be coming in just to view that. Alexa rank, baby! We’ll get tagged and linked to all over the net, bwahahaha! Technoratied, favorited, nominated, digged, stumbled upon… Awooooo.. (dances around)
• A: Too… much… cleavage…!!! Photoshop it now! Her little brother surfs the net, you know….
• D: No one will find this website if.. she… has… no…. page… rank!!…. We need visitors, gadernit!

*pulls out hair by the roots and screams*

• A: Now you did it, she’s not going to post anything anymore. Your fault.
• D: It’s your fault, you prude. Who signed you up as moderator in this blog anyway? Are you even evil?
• A: (sniffs) hmp!

*turns off the monitor and goes to bed*
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Every single day, this conversation occurs.