Savior Complex and Martyrdom: Falling in Love Signs

There are women… gorgeous, intelligent, wealthy and sexy women… who have the pick of any guy they want to be with. The choice range is far beyond those of the not-so-well endowed ones.

Falling in love signs?

It’s surprising that some of these perfect ladies fall for troubled, disturbed and sometimes even neurotic guys. It is a phenomenon I call “savior complex”. Beyond the seemingly perfect facade is a heart that yearns to cure, to witness the miracle of change brought by one’s own doing.

It may also be the mother instinct that lives inside women in general. A well-meaning girl opens her heart to the troubled guy in question, patiently listens to his woes, decides that there’s hope for that person… and ends up rooting for him to change and be better. And inevitably, falling in love and investing a chunk of their emotions.

Change. It is very gratifying to think that another person would want to change just because you requested it. But the fact is, he will not completely transform his life for you. He might say it, but he won’t do it. He’s comfortably ok with your attention, his ego is full with your mothering and adoration. Why should he go through the trouble of re-inventing himself, when his faults and “imperfections” seem to be what attracted you in the first place?

This leads to bitching, frustrations and rants. You want to leave him, give up and run away… but can’t. Why? Because the wily bad boy has already got anchors and chains all over your marshmallow heart.