I came across a recent news in ABS-CBN Interactive about another UP student that died in the hands of his would-be brothers. I am stricken, especially since it gave me a flashback of my ?darkest hour? in UP Manila.

During my time in UP, those who didn’t belong to greek letter brotherhood sects were called Barbarians (usually with contempt). Naive and promdi, I made it my freshman goal to join a greek-letter group. I did pledge to one of the sororities, but as time went on in my pledgeship, I realized quickly that some (if not, most) of the female members did not like me. It was a known fact that during the novice stage, the sorority/fraternity seniors are expected to be mean to you. However, a gut feeling told me that the verbal attacks directed towards me were more than acts of initiation, but rather personal ones. That they hated me came as a surprise back then when I was still learning about my strengths and just getting a glimpse of the diverse sides of my personality. I was doubting myself, seeking acceptance and subconciously, longing to belong. Pride-wounded, I took the brand of “quitter” that they (the members of greek lettered sororities) disdainfully called me. I figured, I would rather keep my budding complex and radical personality than force myself to change (albeit temporarily) so that I may belong to a group that promises political, social and business connections in my future.

I lived with that in the 4 years (4 and 1/2 *cough*) that I stayed in UP Manila. Now that I’m in my late 20s and a mother, it amazes me how I still could get affected with news on those who get killed during hazing or rituals. I realize that I am more than a little bit affected by these news because of the thought: that could have been me.

Initiations or hazing rituals are celebrations that are accompanied with much drinking and bonding. This is the high point of a sorority or a fraternity, because another member will join the group and continue the legacy. But ponder on this: under the influence of alcohol and at the height of a power trip, could someone who was wielding the paddle accidentally hit a bit too hard? With all the giddiness going around, could someone who secretly detests the new inductee inflict just a bit too much “welcoming pain”? The answer is, yes. But then they would all collectively call it “an accident”, in the spirit of brotherhood.

Regardless of rules, not everyone is on the same page as the others in what he considers humane. Wielding that kind of power over a willing and eager recipient will bring out the sadist in even the tamest of souls. Imagine what the effect of that kind of power is on a person with malicious intent. Though they act as a group, the individual members are still just humans; they have different levels of sadism, compassion and alcohol tolerance.

Professor Luis Teodoro’s views on this are direct. He said:

The young men with already promising futures who join fraternities are in short making sure that that future is even more promising, fraternity membership assuring access to ?brods? who can open even wider the doors to opportunity that mean wealth and power in Philippine society.

Take note of that newspaper photograph in which two of the Alpha Phi Beta frat leaders suspected of participation in the hazing of Icasiano are shown at the National Bureau of Investigation. They came accompanied by an alumnus ?brod,? Sen. Robert Barbers, to better assure themselves of preferential treatment

This is the consolation (if you can call it that) that the parents of the hazing victims have to live with: that their sons and daughters dreamed of belonging to a select group that will offer more in their quests for self-development. This comes with the guilt that they were not able to provide their sons/daughters with the same feeling of stability. How could a parent live with the notion that their son/daughter died during his/her quest for self advancement? All they know now is that he/she died in the hands of an individual who drank too much or got influenced too much by his peers. An “accident”.

The name of the greek-letter fraternity is at stake, but it all boils down to who wielded the final blow: still just an individual who could not control his power trip. It’s darkly amusing that some fraternity members would rather go to prison than rat out their “brod” who dealt the killing blow. Imagine that. You rotting in prison, while your brod (who you know killed the pledgee) is graduating in law school with promises to help you get out of there when he becomes a famous criminal lawyer. What a perversion of the sublime concept of brotherhood.

With a heavy heart, I call for a collective toast to the Lost Leaders of the Philippines who went out this way: dreams unfulfilled and their families sundered by grief. I call them leaders because they had the potential to make a difference. They were all from the University of the Philippines, the best of the best.

To name a few (source: GMANews.tv) :

And

Chris Anthony Mendez…… graduating student who is suspected of having died due to fraternity hazing on Aug. 27 (2007).

May God bless their souls.

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